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"Almost all of us got sick and some died, especially women and children. Without a passport, imams refused to bury the bodies. Most of them were just kids under 10 years old," Memetaili said. "The world is so big, but we don't have a space to bury our bodies."

Memetaili felt tricked after experiencing all the suffering. "The reality was totally different from what I imagined. I don't want to mention or hear anything about jihad."

"I would do anything to go back to my parents. They save all their money and send it to me. All I want is their forgiveness."

CONFUSED TERRORIST SUSPECT

Chinese police arrested several terrorists who sneaked into China and prepared to commit terror and violence in 2015.

Ekber is one of them. He received training from the ETIM in Syria and was sent back to China to conduct terrorist attacks.

According to Ekber, his horrifying experience started at the beginning of 2013, when he met a man who called himself "Aili."

"Aili" claimed to have rich knowledge of Islam and kept telling Ekber how to "enter paradise" through martyrdom in a terrorist attack.

According to the police, "Aili" sought to brainwash recruits and used videos to persuade them to participate.

Ekber first came to Turkey and then Syria, where he received military training for three months. During that period, he learned how to use guns and create explosives.

But he felt very confused in training since he felt he had little freedom and was totally dependent on others for clothes and food, and did not know if the food was fit for Muslims to eat.

Instigated by "Aili," Ekber went back to China in early 2015 and planned to conduct a terrorist attack in Shijiazhuang, capital city of Hebei Province, which neighbors Beijing.

Ekber was arrested before carrying out the plan.

Now in custody, Ekber said he feels very sorry for his behavior and realizes who the real victims are in so-called jihad.

He begged for forgiveness from his mother because he had lied to his family, saying that he was studying abroad.

His father passed away of sudden illness on his way from Kashgar to see him.

"Do not believe anything you see (in videos advocating 'Jihad'), do not act emotionally, do think and judge through rational thought," said Ekber.