Morty: Everyone goes on autopilot now and then. The big difference is now you've got a nifty remote to help you decide when.
Michael: This thing is the best.
Morty: By the way, your wife? Absolutely gorgeous.
Michael: She is, isn't she?
Morty: Perfect face. Tight, rocking body.
Michael: You okay?
Morty: Amazing.
Michael: What is?
Morty: She fell for a schlub like you.
Michael: I'm a schlub? I don't know about that, pal. I see a good-looking man right there. You wanna see what a stud I used to be? Yeah? All right, let's take a look at some of the girls I used to fool around with before I met Donna. Oh.
Morty: Is that a man or a woman?
Michael: A woman.
Morty: What is this, Animal Planet? Stop.
Michael: Yes.
Morty: You know, sometimes it's better to keep certain memories just in your head.
Michael: So I've learned, Morty. Good night. Thank you.
Morty: Good night, Michael.
Michael: I'm getting sick, man. Fast-forward me till I'm better.
Donna: Michael, honey, wake up. You'll be late for work.
Michael: What? It's Monday already? Are you kidding me? No more phlegm? I skipped an entire cold? Thanks to you, baby! I love you! No more Tylenol! I don't remember doing any work this weekend. But apparently I did.
Donna: Bad news. There's no hot water.
Michael: What? I gotta take a shower.
Donna: Well, you're gonna freeze your bun-buns off.
Michael: It's all good. Yes! Look at me. All showered and dressed and looking sexy. I like that. I-
Samantha: Did you smoke crack, Daddy?
Michael: Just watch yourtoons and have a great day with Mommy today, okay? Eating cupcakes like your old man. Right here, baby.
Ben: Dad?
Michael: Yes, sir?
Ben: Are you gonna have to work late again tonight?
Michael: Unfortunately, yes.
Samantha: Is there anything we can do to help?
Michael: Well, I'm gonna be partner soon, and I'm gonna need a lot of new building designs. So if you guys have any cool ideas, I want you to draw them up for me.
Ben&Samantha: Okay.
Michael: Rock 'n' roll.
Samantha: I get the paper.
Ben: I got the crayons.
妙語佳句，活學(xué)活用
1. Fall for
Fall for 是個俚語，意思是“to fall in love with，become attracted to” ，例如：I was sure he'd fall for her.
Fall for 作為俚語還有一個常用的意思是“to be deceived by被欺騙”，例如：He fell for the con artist's scheme and lost a great deal of money.
2. Fool around
Fool around 在這里的意思是“Engage in flirting or casual sexual acts; engage in adultery（與異性）鬼混”，例如：He caught the two teenagers fooling around in the basement.
3. Bun-buns
Bun 是一種小圓面包，但在俚語中指“半邊屁股”，圓圓的屁股看起來和小圓面包的外形確實也是很像哦。以此類推，bun-buns 當然就是“整個屁股”了。
